Reflections

BLACK Black

BLACK Black is what you could our honest heart. BB has its head under water in mixed company, only surfacing when it clocks a receptive face. Other than that it’s only in the mind, laughing and commenting.

Luckily enough I haven’t felt like the absolute ‘Other’ in my places of work but BB isn’t displayed in its full glory. Is that the opposite of authenticity? I shouldn’t feel awkward when BB creeps to the surface in my colleagues conversations, and they laugh how BB does or loosen words in line with what compliments the culture, but it kind of scares me. That the other people will see it as them being ‘too bold’ or it somehow shows us up. Obviously it doesn’t but I find myself wanting them to calm down before it goes too far. Too far into what though? I just never want there to be a reason for it to backfire onto us. I wince unnecessarily.

I don’t think I’m the only one who has felt this but I am working to make it baseless. BB won’t be understood or comfortable to everyone but its harmless and enriching. Therefore if BB chooses to naturally float to the surface, I will learn to embrace it wholeheartedly and defend its right.

Reflections

Memories are important

Google photos is a gem, I’ll be minding my business and then it will throw up a memory from 2008. A forgotten day, clean from my memory is retrieved and I laugh at how cool I thought I was. Side note: we should keep the same Piczo pose energy in this here 2020 and forever more amen.

As I reminisce on the curtains that hung in my room, the friends who were my riders and the hairstyles I rocked (who else put lollipops or combs in their hyper erect ponytails?), I’m super glad I didn’t get rid of those times. They remind me of when I could only imagine being an adult so I’m jealous of 13 year old me. I’m also thankful of the friends that always have their phone out, posting to stories and watsapping the footage later. I tend to live in the moment rather than spend time as the videographer. However, memories are important so snap everything.